Message-ID: <1178831.1075854638858.JavaMail.evans@thyme> Date: Fri, 10 Nov 2000 07:19:00 -0800 (PST) From: brian.hoskins@enron.com To: allison.easton@enron.com, hector.campos@enron.com, eric.bass@enron.com, lenine.jeganathan@enron.com Subject: FW: bad santa Mime-Version: 1.0 Content-Type: text/plain; charset=us-ascii Content-Transfer-Encoding: 7bit X-From: Brian Hoskins X-To: Allison Easton, Hector Campos, Eric Bass, Lenine Jeganathan X-cc: X-bcc: X-Folder: \Eric_Bass_Dec2000\Notes Folders\Discussion threads X-Origin: Bass-E X-FileName: ebass.nsf ----- Forwarded by Brian Hoskins/Enron Communications on 11/10/00 03:26 PM ----- Kori Loibl@ECT 11/10/00 03:09 PM To: Stephanie Sever/HOU/ECT@ECT, Alicia Perkins/HOU/EES@EES, Beau Ratliff/HOU/EES@EES, Scott Pleus/Enron Communications@Enron Communications, Michael Nguyen/HOU/ECT@ECT, Don Baughman/HOU/ECT@ECT, Brian Hoskins/Enron Communications@Enron Communications cc: Subject: FW: bad santa ---------------------- Forwarded by Kori Loibl/HOU/ECT on 11/10/2000 03:05 PM --------------------------- This Santa is cold blooded!!! > > > > >> > Subject: bad santa > > > > > > > > > > > > WHEN SANTA RUNS OUT OF PROZAC > > > > > > > > > > > > Dear Santa, > > > > > > I've written you for three years now > >asking > > > > > > for a fire truck . > > > > > > Please, I really really want a fire truck > >this year! > > > > > > Love, Kenny > > > > > > > > > > > > Dear Kenny, > > > > > > Let me make it up to you. Christmas > >Eve, > > > > > > while you sleep, I'm gonna > > > > > > torch your house. You'll have more fire > >trucks than > > > > > > you'll know what to do > > > > > > with. > > > > > > > > > > > > Santa > > > > > > > > > > > > >********************************************************************** > > > > > > Dear Santa, > > > > > > I don't know if you can do this, > >but for > > > > > > Christmas, I'd like for my > > > > > > mommy and daddy to get back together. Please > >see > > > > > > what you can do. > > > > > > Love, Teddy > > > > > > > > > > > > Dear Teddy, > > > > > > What, and ruin that hot affair your > >dad's > > > > > > still having with the > > > > > > baby-sitter? He's banging her like a screen > >door in > > > > > > a hurricane, son! Let me > > > > > > get you some nice Lego's instead. > > > > > > > > > > > > Santa > > > > > > > > > > > > >********************************************************************** > > > > > > Dear Santa, > > > > > > I left milk and cookies for you > >under the > > > > > > tree, and I left carrots > > > > > > for your reindeer outside the backdoor. > > > > > > Love, Susan > > > > > > > > > > > > Dear Susan, > > > > > > Milk gives me the shits and carrots > >make the > > > > > > deer fart in my face. > > > > > > You want to be a kiss-ass? Leave me a glass > >of > > > > > > Chivas Regal and a nice Cuban > > > > > > cigar. > > > > > > > > > > > > Santa > > > > > > > > > > > > >********************************************************************** > > > > > > Dear Santa, > > > > > > I really really want a puppy this > >year. > > > > > > Please please please. > > > > > > PLEASE, Jimmy > > > > > > > > > > > > Jimmy, > > > > > > That whiney-begging shit may work > >with your > > > > > > folks, but that crap > > > > > > don't work up here. You're getting another > >sweater. > > > > > > > > > > > > Santa > > > > > > > > > > > > >********************************************************************** > > > > > > Dear Santa, > > > > > > What do you do the other 364 days of the > >year? > > > > > > Are you making toys? > > > > > > Your friend, Thomas > > > > > > > > > > > > Dear Thomas, > > > > > > All toys get made in China. I have a > >condo > > > > > > in Vegas, where I spend > > > > > > most my time squeezing cocktail waitress' > >asses, and > > > > > > losing all my cash at > > > > > > the craps table. Hey, YOU wanted to know! > > > > > > > > > > > > Santa > > > > > > > > > > > > >********************************************************************** > > > > > > Dear Santa, > > > > > > I wud like a kool toy space ranjur > >for Xmas. > > > > > > Iv ben a good boy all > > > > > > yeer. > > > > > > YeR FReND, BiLLy > > > > > > > > > > > > Dear Billy, > > > > > > Nice spelling. You're on your way to > >being a > > > > > > career lawncare > > > > > > specialist. How 'bout I send you a book so > >you can > > > > > > learn to read and write? > > > > > > I'm giving your older brother the space > >ranger, at > > > > > > least HE can spell! > > > > > > > > > > > > Santa > > > > > > > > > > > > >********************************************************************* > > > > > > Dear Santa, > > > > > > I have been a good girl all year, > >and the > > > > > > only thing I ask for is > > > > > > peace and joy in the world for everybody! > > > > > > Love, Sarah > > > > > > > > > > > > Dear Sarah, > > > > > > Your parents smoked pot when they > >had you, > > > > > > didn't they? > > > > > > > > > > > > Santa > > > > > > > > > > > > >********************************************************************* > > > > > > Dear Santa, > > > > > > I need more Pokemon cards please! All my > >friends > > > > > > have more Pokemon cards > > > > > > than me. Please see what you can do. > > > > > > Love, Michelle > > > > > > > > > > > > Dear Michelle, > > > > > > It blows my mind. Kids are forcing > >their > > > > > > parents to buy hundreds of > > > > > > dollars worth of these stupid cards, and > >none of you > > > > > > snot-nosed brats are > > > > > > even learning to play the game. Let me get > >you > > > > > > something more your > > > > > > speed, like "Chutes and Ladders." > > > > > > Santa > > > > > > > > > > > > >********************************************************************* > > > > > > Dear Santa, > > > > > > I want a new bike, playstation, a > >train, > > > > > > some G.I. Joes, a dog, a > > > > > > drum kit, a pony and a tuba. > > > > > > Love,Francis > > > > > > > > > > > > Dear Francis, > > > > > > Who in the hell names their kid "Francis" > >nowadays? > > > > > > Santa > > > > > > > > > > > > >********************************************************************* > > > > > > Dear Santa, > > > > > > Do you see us when we're sleeping, > >do you > > > > > > really know when we're > > > > > > awake, like in the song? > > > > > > Love, Jessica > > > > > > > > > > > > Dear Jessica, > > > > > > You are that gullible? Good luck in > > > > > > whatever you do, I'm skipping > > > > > > your house. > > > > > > Santa > > > > > > > > > > > > >********************************************************************* > > > > > > Dear Santa, > > > > > > We don't have a chimney in our > >house, how do > > > > > > you get into our home? > > > > > > Love, Marky > > > > > > > > > > > > Mark, > > > > > > First, stop calling yourself > >"Marky"; > > > > > > that's why you're getting > > > > > > your ass kicked at school. Secondly, you > >don't live > > > > > > in a house, that's a > > > > > > low-rent apartment complex you're living in. > > > > > > Thirdly, I get inside your pad > > > > > > just like all the burglars do, through your > >bedroom > > > > > > window. > > > > > > > > > > > > Sweet Dreams! > > > > > > Santa > > >