Message-ID: <10314127.1075845232888.JavaMail.evans@thyme> Date: Thu, 24 May 2001 05:15:45 -0700 (PDT) From: john.arnold@enron.com To: mike.maggi@enron.com Subject: FW: The True Story of a Private Equity "Stud" Mime-Version: 1.0 Content-Type: text/plain; charset=us-ascii Content-Transfer-Encoding: 7bit X-From: Arnold, John X-To: Maggi, Mike X-cc: X-bcc: X-Folder: \Maggi, Mike\Maggi, Mike\Deleted Items X-Origin: MAGGI-M X-FileName: Maggi, Mike.pst -----Original Message----- From: "Eva Pao" @ENRON [mailto:IMCEANOTES-+22Eva+20Pao+22+20+3Cepao+40mba2002+2Ehbs+2Eedu+3E+40ENRON@ENRON.com] Sent: Wednesday, May 23, 2001 11:58 PM To: jarnold@enron.com Subject: FW: The True Story of a Private Equity "Stud" Importance: High -----Original Message----- From: Anand R. Radhakrishnan [mailto:aradhakrishnan@mba2002.hbs.edu] Sent: Thursday, May 17, 2001 7:24 PM To: Eva Pao; David Hayes Subject: FW: The True Story of a Private Equity "Stud" Importance: High So, this email is floating around the Jan cohort....it's pretty unbelievable -----Original Message----- From: Clay Thomson [mailto:cthomson@mba2002.hbs.edu] Sent: Thursday, May 17, 2001 7:05 PM To: aradhakrishnan@mba2002.hbs.edu Subject: FW: The True Story of a Private Equity "Stud" Importance: High read story below. ?????????? -----Original Message----- From: Kosty Gilis [mailto:kgilis@mba2002.hbs.edu] Sent: Thursday, May 17, 2001 6:48 PM To: J.R. Davis; mconnolly@mba2002.hbs.edu; cthomson@mba2002.hbs.edu; jrousseau@mba2002.hbs.edu; jcrisan@mba2002.hbs.edu Subject: FW: The True Story of a Private Equity "Stud" Importance: High you need to read this in its entirety ... apparently it's 100% true ... someone's going to be out of a job soon. -----Original Message----- From: Brijesh Jeevarathnam [mailto:bjeevarathnam@mba2002.hbs.edu] Sent: Thursday, May 17, 2001 5:28 PM To: Hira Verma; Lee Monahan; Pete Cureton; Kosty Gilis; Mike Genstil; Maxim Kolodkin; Edward Han; Joon Hyon; Carlos Hernandez; Daniel Hawkins; Dobbin Bookman Subject: FW: The True Story of a Private Equity "Stud" Importance: High This is hilarious.... Brijesh (B.J.) Jeevarathnam MBA Class of 2002 Harvard Business School Phone: (617) 493-8008 Sent: Thursday, May 17, 2001 5:13 PM To: Jeff Quake; Judy Lu; Roger Land; Catharon Johnston; BJ Jeevarathnam; Lester Ip; Andrew Eisner; Lou DiLorenzo; John D'Agostino; Christian van Tienhoven; Jeff Albee; Jeff Wald; Scott Simon; Zack Kramer Subject: FW: The Legend of Peter Chung This is comedy. Sounds like Jake in two years. -----Original Message----- From: Justin Pollack [mailto:Pollack@auda.net] Sent: Thursday, May 17, 2001 11:28 AM Subject: The True Story of a Private Equity "Stud" As you may know, the only person more arrogant than an investment banker is someone in private equity. Investment bankers pride themselves on making vast amounts of money, but a successful private equity professional takes devilish pride and supports an even bigger ego for working fewer hours while making even more money than his (rarely her) investment banking brethren. Unfortunately, some members of the private equity community mistakenly believe that their growing wealth is the result of their own talent and charming personality rather than a simple profiting from the hoarding of capital, as Karl Marx so astutely described. Consider the plight of Peter Chung (see attached email), a recent hire at the Carlyle Group. After completing his two-year stint as an Analyst at Merrill Lynch, Chung was persuaded to seek out new opportunities in Korea working as part of Carlyle's vast Asian investment team. Working at a private equity firm allows Chung to check out Korean night clubs (which would be legally classified as brothels in the United States) 3-4 times a week, though Chung made it clear that he needs only two months to "learn a little bit of the buyside business" so he can begin nightly visits. Already a self-described "stud" on the New York City dating scene, Chung looked to the emerging island of Korea where the standard of living for young foreign men is bolstered by the low per capita income of native residents (roughly $12,600 per person). By making in excess of ten times the average national wage, Chung quickly found himself to be quite the ladies man as the locals were attracted to his fat wallet and U.S. citizenship. Thus bolstered by an initial rendezvous or two, Chung decided to cement his legacy by setting out on the quixotic mission to sleep with all of the fine women of Korea. As of May 15, 2001, Chung alludes to having had sexual relations with five "hot chicks." According to Chung's own calculations, there are roughly one billion "hot chicks" remaining in Korea. Clearly there is a break in Chung's sexual predator model as he apparently believes that not only is the global female population of 3 billion comprised of 1/3 hot Korean chicks, but he will be able to sleep with that many before his finest member falls off or he dies of exhaustion. Sadly, Chung cannot complete his mission alone. The quality of prophylactics in Korea are not quite up to U.S. standards (Chung would probably claim Korean condoms are too small) and he needs your help to continue his quest for infamy. If you would like to contribute to this valiant mission, please direct your gift of a FDA-approved "domes" to the address below: Peter Chung The Carlyle Group Suite 1009, CCMM Bldg. 12, Yoido-dong, Youngdeungpo-ku Seoul 150-010, Korea Chung asks that you consider using FedEx or another international overnight courier since he may be on the verge of running out of protection. Alternatively, if you would like to pursue a job working for The Carlyle Group in Korea, write to the following address: The Honorable James A. Baker 1001 Pennsylvania Avenue NW Suite 220 South Washington, DC 20004-2505 Please note that Mr. Baker, the lead spokesperson for The Carlyle Group, a the former Secretary of State from the George Herbert Walker Bush Administration. Since leaving the White House, Jim Baker has continued his international mission to spread goodwill and STDs throughout the world by supporting young Romeos such as Mr. Chung. For a first-hand account of life in private equity, please read Peter Chung's travelogue (attached). Please keep in mind that Chung's experience is partially a function of his prior status as a "stud" and may not be reflective of private equity experiences in general. Not all of us can hope to be as smart, debonair and modest as Mr. Chung. Regards, Justin ---------------------------------------------------------------------------- ---- From: "Peter Chung" To: "'james_graff@rsco.com'" ,"'lgreer@ivisionary.com'" ,"'matt.harty@goldpocket.com'" ,"'kevin_matto@rsco.com'" ,"'wrobertson@exchange.ml.com'" ,"'pstanberry@onebox.com'" ,"'shiv.vasisht@ubsw.com'" ,"'johnmin@microsoft.com'" ,"'brandon.park@csfb.com'" ,"'jose.park@webvision.com'" ,"'kevin.woo@avenuea.com'" Subject: LIVING LIKE A KING Date: Tue, 15 May 2001 20:26:21 -0400 So I've been in Korea for about a week and a half now and what can I say, LIFE IS GOOD.... I've got a spanking brand new 2000 sq. foot 3 bedroom apt. with a 200 sq. foot terrace running the entire length of my apartment with a view overlooking Korea's main river and nightline......Why do I need 3 bedrooms? Good question,.... the main bedroom is for my queen size bed,...where CHUNG is going to fuck every hot chick in Korea over the next 2 years (5 down, 1,000,000,000 left to go).... the second bedroom is for my harem of chickies, and the third bedroom is for all of you fuckers when you come out to visit my ass in Korea. I go out to Korea's finest clubs, bars and lounges pretty much every other night on the weekdays and everyday on the weekends to (I think in about 2 months, after I learn a little bit of the buyside business I'll probably go out every night on the weekdays). I know I was a stud in NYC but I pretty much get about, on average, 5-8 phone numbers a night and at least 3 hot chicks that say that they want to go home with me every night I go out. I love the buyside,.... I have bankers calling me everyday with opportunties and they pretty much cater to my every whim - you know (golfing events, lavish dinners, a night out clubbing). The guys I work with are also all chilll - I live in the same apt building as my VP and he drives me around in his Porsche (1 of 3 in all of Korea) to work and when we go out. What can I say,.... live is good,... CHUNG is KING of his domain here in Seoul..... So,.... all of you fuckers better keep in touch and start making plans to come out and visit my ass ASAP, I'll show you guys an unbelievable time....My contact info is below.... Oh, by the way,... someone's gotta start fedexing me boxes of domes,...I brought out about 40 but I think I'll run out of them by Saturday..... Laters, CHUNG Peter Chung The Carlyle Group Suite 1009, CCMM Bldg. 12, Yoido-dong, Youngdeungpo-ku Seoul 150-010, Korea Tel: (822) 2004-8412 Fax: (822) 2004-8440 email: pchung@thecarlylegroup.co.kr Mobile: 8216-478-5175