Message-ID: <16834226.1075845460942.JavaMail.evans@thyme> Date: Thu, 17 May 2001 01:48:00 -0700 (PDT) From: david.delainey@enron.com To: greg.whalley@enron.com, john.lavorato@enron.com, janet.dietrich@enron.com, dan.leff@enron.com Subject: FW: DARWIN AWARDS Mime-Version: 1.0 Content-Type: text/plain; charset=us-ascii Content-Transfer-Encoding: 7bit X-From: David W Delainey X-To: Greg Whalley, John J Lavorato, Janet R Dietrich, Dan Leff X-cc: X-bcc: X-Folder: \Greg_Whalley_Oct2001\Notes Folders\Discussion threads X-Origin: WHALLEY-G X-FileName: gwhalley.nsf ---------------------- Forwarded by David W Delainey/HOU/EES on 05/17/2001 08:47 AM --------------------------- Ken Rice@ENRON COMMUNICATIONS 05/16/2001 09:34 AM To: David W Delainey/HOU/EES@EES cc: Kevin Hannon/Enron Communications@Enron Communications Subject: FW: DARWIN AWARDS Delainey Why is it that a Canadian always seems to win the Darwin Awards? Ken ----- Forwarded by Ken Rice/Enron Communications on 05/16/01 09:26 AM ----- donrs@donrs.com 05/16/01 08:46 AM To: RMSherrill@duke-energy.com, lance_riley@anadarko.com, Ken Rice/Enron Communications@Enron Communications, alinbeck@redstonegroup.com cc: Subject: FW: DARWIN AWARDS -----Original Message----- From: Bob and Sharyn Perkins [mailto:bsbprkns@jump.net] Sent: Tuesday, May 15, 2001 9:04 PM To: Undisclosed-Recipient:; Subject: Fw: DARWIN AWARDS Read it and shake your head in wonder. > Subject: FW: DARWIN AWARDS > > > >> Hot off the press! The 2000-2001 Darwin Awards > Are Here!! > The latest > >> Darwin Awards update.... > >> 1. A Canadian man, searching for a way of > getting drunk cheaply, because > >> he had no money with which to buy alcohol, mixed > gasoline with milk. Not > >> surprisingly, this concoction made him ill, and > he vomited into the > >> fireplace in his house. This resulting explosion > and fire burned his house > >> down, killing both him and his sister. > >> 2. A 34-year-old white male found dead in the > basement of his home died of > >> suffocation, according to police. He was > approximately 6'2" tall and > >> weighed 225 pounds. He was wearing a pleated > skirt, white bra, black and > >> white saddle shoes, and a woman's wig. It > appeared that he was trying to > >> create a schoolgirl's uniform look. He was also > wearing a military gas > >> mask that had the filter canister removed and a > rubber hose attached in > >> its place. The other end of the hose was > connected to a one end of a > >> hollow wooden tube approx. 12" long and 3" in > diameter. The tube's other > >> end was inserted into his rear end for reasons > unknown, and was the cause > >> of his suffocation. Police found the task of > explaining the circumstances > >> of his death to his family very awkward. > >> 3. Three Brazilian men were flying in a light > aircraft at low altitude > >> when another plane approached. It appears that > they decided to moon the > >> occupants of the other plane, but lost control of > their own aircraft and > >> crashed. They were all found dead in the wreckage > with their pants around > >> their ankles. > >> 4. A police officer in Ohio responded to a 911 > call. She had no details > >> before arriving, except that someone had reported > that his father was not > >> breathing. Upon arrival, the officer found the > man face down on the couch, > >> naked. When she rolled him over to check for a > pulse and to start CPR, she > >> noticed burn marks around his genitals. After the > ambulance arrived and > >> removed the man - who was declared dead on > arrival at the hospital - the > >> police made a closer inspection of the couch, and > noticed that the man had > >> made a hole between the cushions. Upon flipping > the couch over, they > >> discovered what caused his death. Apparently the > man had a habit of > >> putting his penis between the cushions, down into > the hole and between two > >> electrical sanders (with the sandpaper removed, > for obvious reasons). > >> According to the story, after his orgasm the > discharge shorted out one of > >> the sanders, electrocuting him. > >> 5. A 27-year-old French woman lost control of her > car on a highway near > >> Marseilles and crashed into a tree, seriously > injuring her passenger and > >> killing herself. As a commonplace road accident, > this would not have > >> qualified for a Darwin nomination, were it not > for the fact that the > >> driver's attention had been distracted by her > Tamagotchi key ring, which > >> had started urgently beeping for food as she > drove along. In an attempt to > >> press the correct buttons to save the > Tamagotchi's life, the woman lost > >> her own. > >> 6. A 22-year-old Reston, VA man was found dead > after he tried to use > >> octopus straps to bungee jump off a 70-foot > railroad trestle. Fairfax > >> County police said Eric Barcia, a fast-food > worker, taped a bunch of these > >> straps together, wrapped an end around one foot, > anchored the other end to > >> the trestle at Lake Accotink Park, jumped and hit > the pavement. Warren > >> Carmichael, a police spokesman, said > investigators think Barcia was alone > >> because his car was found nearby. "The length of > the cord that he had > >> assembled was greater than the distance between > the trestle and the > >> ground", Carmichael said. Police say the apparent > cause of death was > >> "Major trauma". > >> 7. A man in Alabama died from rattlesnake bites. > It seems that he and a > >> friend were playing a game of catch, using the > rattlesnake as a ball. The > >> friend - no doubt, a future Darwin Awards > candidate - was hospitalised. > >> 8. Employees in a medium-sized warehouse in west > Texas noticed the smell > >> of a gas leak. Sensibly, management evacuated the > building, extinguishing > >> all potential sources of ignition lights, power, > etc. After the building > >> had been evacuated, two technicians from the gas > company were dispatched. > >> Upon entering the building, they found they had > difficulty navigating in > >> the dark. To their frustration, none of the > lights worked (you can see > >> what's coming, can't you?). Witnesses later > described the sight of one of > >> the technicians reaching into his pocket and > retrieving an object, that > >> resembled a cigarette lighter. Upon operation of > the lighter-like object, > >> the gas in the warehouse exploded, sending pieces > of it up to three miles > >> away. Nothing was found of the technicians, but > the lighter was virtually > >> untouched by the explosion. The technician > suspected of causing the blast > >> had never been thought of as 'bright' by his > peers. > >