Message-ID: <14338560.1075852543978.JavaMail.evans@thyme> Date: Thu, 28 Jun 2001 05:45:41 -0700 (PDT) From: beth.cherry@enform.com To: e-mail <.fred@enron.com>, e-mail <.guidroz@enron.com>, jason.wolfe@enron.com, e-mail <.jondawonda@enron.com>, e-mail <.josh@enron.com>, e-mail <.kristen@enron.com>, e-mail <.susan@enron.com>, e-mail <.zeke@enron.com> Subject: FW: Martha Stewart vs Me Cc: landry@enron.com, ashley.landry@enform.com Mime-Version: 1.0 Content-Type: text/plain; charset=us-ascii Content-Transfer-Encoding: 7bit Bcc: landry@enron.com, ashley.landry@enform.com X-From: "Cherry, Beth" @ENRON X-To: Fred Lindner (E-mail) , Guidroz (E-mail) , Wolfe, Jason , Jondawonda (E-mail) , Josh (E-mail) , Kristen Oland (E-mail) , Susan (E-mail) , Zeke (E-mail) , veronica.cherry@awc-inc.com X-cc: Landry, Ashley X-bcc: X-Folder: \JWOLFE (Non-Privileged)\06-saved X-Origin: Wolfe-J X-FileName: JWOLFE (Non-Privileged).pst REALLY PEOPLE....THIS IS ME..... Subject: Martha Stewart vs Me > > > Martha's way #1: Stuff a miniature marshmallow in the bottom of a > sugar cone to prevent ice cream drips. > > > My way: Just suck the ice cream out of the bottom of the cone, for > > > Pete's sake, you are probably lying on the couch with your feet up > > > eating it anyway. > > > ***** > > > Martha's way #2: Use a meat baster to "squeeze" your pancake batter > > > onto the hot griddle and you'll get perfectly shaped pancakes > > > every time. > > > My way: Buy the precooked kind you nuke in the microwave for 30 > seconds. > > > The hard part is getting them out of the plastic bag. > > > ***** > > > Martha's way #3: To keep potatoes from budding, place an apple in the > > > bag with the potatoes. > > > My way: Buy Hungry Jack mashed potato mix and keep it in the pantry > for > > > up to a year. > > > ***** > > > Martha's way #4: To prevent egg shells from cracking, add a pinch of > > > salt to the water before hard boiling. > > > My way: Who cares if they crack, aren't you going to take the shells > off > > > anyway? > > > ***** > > > Martha's way #5: To get the most juice out of fresh lemons, bring > them > > > to room temperature and roll them under your palm against the kitchen > > > counter before squeezing. > > > My way: Sleep with the lemons in between the mattress and box > > > springs. > > > ***** > > > Martha's way #6: To easily remove burnt-on food from your skillet, > > > simply add a drop or two of dish soap and enough water to cover > bottom > > > of pan, and bring to a boil on stovetop. > > > My way: Eat at Chili's every night and avoid cooking. > > > ***** > > > Martha's way #7: Spray your Tupperware with nonstick cooking spray > > > before pouring in tomato based sauces and there won't be any stains. > > > My way: Feed your garbage disposal and there won't be any leftovers. > > > ***** > > > Martha's way #8: When a cake recipe calls for flouring the baking > pan, > > > use a bit of the dry cake mix instead and there won't be any white > mess > > > on the outside of the cake. > > > My way: Go to the bakery. They'll even decorate it for you. > > > ***** > > > Martha's way #9: If you accidentally over salt a dish while it's > still > > > cooking, drop in a peeled potato and it will absorb the excess salt > for > > > an instant "fix me up" > > > My way: If you over salt a dish while you are cooking, that's too > > > bad. My motto: I made it and you will eat it and I don't care how bad > it > > > tastes. > > > ***** > > > Martha's way #10: Wrap celery in aluminum foil when putting in the > > > refrigerator and it will keep for weeks. > > > My way: Celery? Never heard of the stuff. > > > ***** > > > Martha's way #11: Brush some beaten egg white over pie crust before > > > baking to yield a beautiful glossy finish. > > > My way: The Mrs. Smith frozen pie directions do not include brushing > egg > > > whites over the crust and so I don't do it. > > > ***** > > > Martha's way #12: Place a slice of apple in hardened brown sugar to > > > soften it. > > > My Way: Brown sugar is supposed to be "soft"? > > > ***** > > > Martha's way #13: When boiling corn on the cob, add a pinch of sugar > to > > > help bring out the corn's natural sweetness. > > > My Way: The only kind of corn I buy comes in a can. > > > ***** > > > Martha's way #14: To determine whether an egg is fresh, immerse it in > a > > > pan of cool, salted water. If it sinks, it is fresh, but if it rises > to > > > the surface, throw it away. > > > My way: Eat, cook, or use the egg anyway. If you feel bad later, you > > > will know it wasn't fresh. > > > ***** > > > Martha's way #15: Cure for headaches: Take a lime, cut it in half and > > > rub it on your forehead. The throbbing will go away. > > > My way: Martha, dear, the only reason this works is because you can't > rub > > > a lime on your forehead without getting lime juice in your eye, and > then > > > the > > > problem isn't the headache anymore, it is because you are now blind. > > > ***** > > > Martha's way #16: Don't throw out all that leftover wine. Freeze into > > > ice cubes for future use in casseroles and sauces. > > > My way: Leftover wine? > > > ***** > > > Martha's way #17: If you have a problem opening jars: Try using latex > > > dishwashing gloves. They give a non slip grip that makes opening jars > > > easy. > > > My way: Go ask the very cute neighbor to do it. > > > ***** > > > Martha's way #18: Potatoes will take food stains off your fingers. > Just > > > slice and rub raw potato on the stains and rinse with water. > > > My way: Mashed potatoes will now be replacing the antibacterial soap > in > > > the handy dispenser next to my sink. > > > ***** > > > Martha's way #19: Now look what you can do with Alka Seltzer. > > > * Clean a toilet. Drop in two Alka-Seltzer tablets, wait twenty > minutes, > > > brush and flush. The citric acid and effervescent action clean > > > vitreous china. > > > * Clean a vase. To remove a stain from the bottom of a glass vase or > > > cruet, fill with water and drop in two Alka-Seltzer tablets. > > > * Polish jewelry. Drop two Alka-Seltzer tablets into a glass of water > > > and immerse the jewelry for two minutes. > > > * Clean a thermos bottle. Fill the bottle with water, drop in > > > four Alka-Seltzer tablets, and let soak for an hour (or longer, if > > > necessary). > > > My way: Put your jewelry, vases, and thermos in the toilet. Add some > > > Alka-Seltzer and you have solved a whole bunch of problems at once.