The Zoo Computing Laboratory
Yale University Computer Science Department
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Here be DSACs of Myth and Legend . . .

the men and occasional woman who in their time bestrode the Zoo like conquering gods. Some people might say "nerds" instead of "conquering gods". Jealousy inspires such unseemly bitterness.

  • Jim Terry, 03-05. His tyranny was renowned, his strength and guile, legendary. Also his odd penchant for extremely heavy clothing.
Famous for: sleeping in the Zoo, not sleeping in the Zoo, sleeping everywhere else, showering in the Zoo, living in the Zoo for two weeks, never having been seen in an upright position, making odd and somewhat disconcerting comments to anyone who would listen.
Quote: "Concerning the fact that this would be my second term on DSAC: It has been suggested that unless an organization institutes term limits, the rise of a dictatorial leader is inevitable, and with it the death-knell of freedom and democracy. Some bleeding-heart pansies would have you believe this is a bad thing. I think we should focus less on the negative and try to think more about the positive here. I would like to put forth the idea that power corrupts, but absolute power is absolutely awesome. If my library of dynamic quotes doesn't impress you, then I don't know what will."

Famous for: fashionable array of Matrix-like clothing, impressively effective DSAC dictatorship, DDR parties, composing plugins for enhanced browser security while jumping out of planes, one-line program solutions, magical powers, general badassedness.
Quote:
"I want to write a bootable floppy operating system that runs a simple HTTP web server using the network add-in. I'm not sure why that strikes me as worth doing, but it does."

Famous for: Being helpful. Also: being OCD. You may have seen him sleeping on the floor of the Zoo with a cute stuffed hippo.
Quote:
"We could solve this problem with a Guest Page Table."

or: one side of the following exchange:

"You know, if you gave an infinite number of monkeys an infinite number of laptops for an infinite amount of time, they would eventually produce the perfect operating system."
--Yes, so?
"Your program: three monkeys, fifteen minutes."
--Ouch.
"After the first ten minutes, they gave up and started throwing feces at each other."

  • Boting Zhang, 02-03.
Famous for: Being the guardian spirit of the Zoo, unconventional dressing habits, making empty promises of a ball pit on the second floor, living in the Zoo for two weeks, punditry, artistic choice of yellow hats.
Quote: "You know, they did this experiment on Navy SEALs, where they made them stay awake for two weeks. All of them recovered completely after three nights of ordinary sleep. So, that was two weeks. I think I should be able to handle at least one . . . "

  • Luis Ortiz, 86-89.
Famous for: Inciting a virulent flame war between DSAC and the first year grad students of his day. You'll note a sign on the Zoo wall stating the most important Zoo rules. The one forbidding food or drink in the Zoo used to also forbid swords red with the blood of first year grad students. But then Mr. Ortiz came along.
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Page last modified on November 18, 2005, at 06:45 AM